Dear blog. What am i at ? After last year, especially after my last race i thought i could cut it as a road racer again. Then my early training seemed good, I was riding hard and dropping the other guys onthe hills. Then along came my first race, it was cold and I felt crappy, finished in the bunch.
Didn't try particualry hard. Next race, the Wyre Forest Hilly, cold again and did a rather poor time. Then the 4-up in which I was dropped after a few miles. That made me feel rather bad. So my feeling I could do 'something' at the start of the year has gone. Now I am going to pay for a coach. For 6 months and then see how I'm doing. Maybe its the drinking. Like I keep saying I'll stop, this week will be my last week, but again and again I drink too much in these bloody hotels I live in during the week. Like last night, double rum, pint of lager and two bottles of wine. Far to much. At least I didn't eat lots of crisps and cheese, which is my other failing. Where am I going with Hazel ? What does she think, that I will come up and we will live together in a cottage in the hills ? Niether of our lifestyles would
suit that. Is this just some romantic idea she has to make life better ? I just have racing as my ideal to make life better. It has got rid of my fat, made me fit, reduced my alcohol intake a little, but not enough. This plan of going home to train keeps me out of the hotel bar for one evening at least. But I will probably be back in the bar on Wednesday or Thursday. I did notice by not drinking lots of beer or lager, keeping to excessive amounts of wine, I don't feel too bad today. Also by eating a good meal I think that helped. Winston Churchill said always eat well when you drink well, or words to that effect. And I guess that doesn't mean eating a very large bag of black pepper crisps and cheese. Ho hum. I wonder what routine my coach will set me ? I should set out my aims for next year. One is to finish in
the top 20 of the National Veterans series. I think there are 4 or 5 races. These are 60 plus miles, I now know I can race this distance after riding a few this year. My other aim is to get under the hour in a '25, and close to 22 minutes in a '10. I know both of these are achievable. I did 22.50 to win the Concorde club '10 championship in 1988. That was on a road bike, so with aero extensions I should knock 1 minute off that. I did a 1.00.50 ? In a '25 on a rolling course, up round Bassets Pole in 1988. So the magic 50 something minutes is possible. Apart from that what else with my life ? Joanne will maybe be going to University in September next year. David will just plod along with school, so what difference will Joanne going make ? Will she go ? Work ? What will happen, is the economy going to slide into recession, will we get more work ? I have work until early next year, but will the company continue with us doing this ? Will I have to go to another bit of the company to earn a crust ? Are we going towards a major slump, the auguries don't look good, increasing oil prices, US problems. Both the US and us in the UK are increasing Govt. spending at alarming rates. That has been a recipe for the usual cyclic downturns combined with rising taxes combined with rising inflation. The tax rises will hit me next year with the National Insurance rises. This will also hit companies who will no doubt cut jobs to lower their wage bills. Public sector workers are getting big pay rises and looking for more. This is just so much like the seventies all over again. I just can't beleive this Govt. can be making the same mistakes as their predecessors. Fools. I just won't plan my life in advance, as you never ever know. Just plan it in little bits. I had a plan at the end of 1998 and into 1999 to move into consultancy but that just didn't happen. I was happy with my lot up until mid 2001, pay rises and bonuses seemed to happen nicely, and I was good at what I did. Then along came this god-awful document design thing, Optio. It seemed good when I went for training in Atlanta, but when I first worked on the product in Dartford it wasn't so good. Then when I realised what was wnated at I-R I felt bad. Then with the debacle of my quotes for the work, with I-R people laughing at the initial days I felt worse. And so it continued with feeling bad form July 2001 until pretty well recently. Thats no way to live, feeling constantly
unhappy with my work, little wonder I'm still drinking heavily. Ho hum.